American football is pretty tough.

A violent game, and if that’s not enough

Turns out it may be conniving as well

According to the latest kiss and tell…

With draft picks and betting both on the line

Their LUCKIEST outcome would be a huge fine.

When we put all our “pronouns” on display

There is but one thing that will come our way –

Folks will see it and make a decision

About who you are with narrow vision.

Is this one piece of data so compelling?

I think my sun sign would be more telling.

This is the guy who has the claim to fame

Of launching Trump into the media game.

He first got him into reality shows

It was a great business, everyone knows.

Then later he took charge at CNN

And used Trump for profit all over again.

Suddenly now it has all become clear!

All those fights on Southwest throughout the year

With passengers and crew going at it

As if they’d discovered a brand new habit

Really weren’t over what mask to use…

Much more likely it’s just there was no booze!

Such extensive use of the censure

Has put us on quite the adventure.

This one however should make your jaw drop!

I mean, for real, when will this nonsense stop?

The GOP has lost its mind on this…

Trump is dragging it down to the abyss.

Perhaps one day we will get to a place

Where people realize that the human race –

And, in fact, the world we all live in,

This beautiful place we’ve been given –

Is loaded with nuance that creates worth…

Yes, hunters too want to save planet Earth.

Rampaging pigs in Silicon Valley?

There must have just been an IPO rally!

Ok, well yes, they’re in the East Bay

Not really the Valley, but not far away.

And no, these beasts aren’t capitalist pigs

They’re actual hogs, not venture gigs.

The numbers have grown so insanely high

That I just can’t fathom it, if I try.

The problem it seems is that we never

Do anything even close to clever

To make anyone feel the consequence

Of borrowing money beyond all sense.