I know we’ve dealt with this one before

So apologies if it’s a bore.

But all of this simply makes no sense

And Hollywood is getting tense.

The industry yields a surplus in trade…

And where will White Lotus next be made?!

Conservatives often get all upset

When accused of being a racist threat.

I generally agree that it’s unfair

And is not reflective of values they share.

But if you want to know why people think it

Have a look at this priceless trinket.

I’m really excited about this news!

For one he shares Pope Francis’s views

And that he’s American is super cool.

This is religion’s major Crown Jewel.

I wish him success and all the best

In making the world a little more blessed.

I agree with Trump on this decision

And it shouldn’t cause any division.

We won the wars for our foreign allies

We should celebrate too, we earned the prize.

And maybe having this celebration

Will remind Trump why we’re a great nation.

People here don’t tend to think very much

About other nations and how they might touch

The protective shield that we hide behind

But this little spat could threaten mankind.

If these two countries start nuclear war

The damage will reach almost every shore.

Kindergarten could not have served better

Examples of nonsense from a bed-wetter

As these two leaders of big nations

Bickering about their relations.

One says “Never should you say ‘never’.”

The other says “Never”… I mean have you ever?

Another brilliant and well-reasoned plan!

I wonder how long his attention span

Will last on this one before it’s changed

As the people impacted call it deranged.

He thinks he’s skilled and highly adroit…

But his only advisor was Jon Voight.

It’s enough to make a man want to cry

The Absolute Greed of this slimy guy.

Nothing at all is considered taboo

Promote Thyself is what he will do.

It’s just disgusting, his blasphemous dance

Along with his partner JD Vance.

Our friends in DC have a great new plan

And if this doesn’t MAGA nothing can.

They’re gonna cancel buoys in the sea

Since they don’t do much for boater safety…

Just like all cars now have GPS

Let’s save on street signs for real progress!

What a threat this ambi-player will be,

Pitching from the right or as a leftie…!

Batting orders will fall in disarray

As hitters struggle to put the ball in play.

He’ll crush it when we read the post-mortem,

Provided that Trump doesn’t deport him…