Long distance races are totally exhausting

Especially across tundra with snowy frosting.

The Iditarod covers nearly 1,000 miles

And is a trial that generates very few smiles.

So it’s certainly a bummer after you’ve won

To be stuck in the Arctic till COVID is done.

For a while there I was very concerned.

A key constituency was being spurned.

Everyone seemed to have forgotten

That guns aren’t just for shooting rotten

People who look the way criminals do

But are used for protecting potatoes too!

I mean, where do we go from here?

He makes me need to drink some beer.

It’s so out of touch that it’s almost funny.

But for Donnie’s campaign it’s milk and honey.

And even apologizing, which of course is right,

Will be used against him in the political fight.

Well this is certainly an ironic turn!

When working at home it’s easy to burn

A great deal of time down the rabbit hole

As access to media takes its toll.

It isn’t always efficiency’s best look…

And the reason why is often Facebook!

Of course he wants to be crystal clear

Because uncertainty is what people fear.

He says he’s been taking it for a while

Since White House infections started going viral.

But is he really? What do you suppose?

From his doctor’s note no one knows.

Finally we see the bitter chill thaw

And caring unity replace partisan flaw!

Nice Nancy is ever so concerned for the Prez

Who’s health may be more fragile than he says.

And Donnie for his part being a lamb

Showing it’s safe, not some sort of scam.

You’d think this would get a bit more press

Not that it will help relieve much stress.

When they reopened they were maligned.

Even Donnie thought they should stay confined.

But the infection rate has not changed much.

So we should study why that is such.

Turns out humans may not be so bad

And the Lord of the Flies is the wrong ad.

When seven boys were really marooned

The captain who found them happily crooned

That they’d built gardens and chicken pens

And lived on their own as the best of friends.

No doubt these masks are a total drag

So this genius here has the right to brag.

You know how it’s hard to breath in air?

And exhaling too can be a bear?

Problem solved with a strategic hole!

The future is bright for this young soul.

The pandemic isn’t bad for all folks

Even for those who believe it’s a hoax.

Donnie’s convicted campaign chief

Spent some time in jail, albeit brief

And will finish his sentence with no fuss

Imprisoned at home, just like us.