Valentine’s Day is here once again

With its pressure to be like Barbie and Ken.

There are plenty of reasons why it sucks –

Everything costs like a million bucks!

But there is one different side to the story,

For me it’s worthwhile, because of Lorrie…

I can’t say this comes as a big surprise…

It can be pretty scary as the blade flies

Round and round, just a bit overhead

Always made me think – if it splits, I’m dead.

So the Safety Commission has saved the day!

And people think government has lost its way…

This film is not always so easy to watch

But its treatment of the topic is top notch.

Parkland was struck by a terrible crime,

The deadliest school shooting of our time.

After Sandy Hook we said guns won’t survive.

Mass shootings since then? 2,375…

Lord only knows how it happened so fast

But email and voice are a thing of the past.

Watching our youth as they tap tap tap

The “phone” on their phone is the least used app!

So inexperience makes their manners go flat…

But what excuse do the rest of us have for that?

So this guy decides to bike around the world

Not knowing into what dangers he’ll be hurled.

And just to make it a bit more of a mission

He chose to include one crazy addition –

A unicycle! Not a bike with two wheels…

I shudder to think how his butt feels.

Four years ago was the unlikely sight

Of Donnie’s slow-moving escalator flight.

Most people laughed, it seemed so surreal

But it turns out he was able to gain appeal.

Could another (real) billionaire pull this off,

Or has the category now made voters scoff?

Well it certainly would be quite bizarre,

Perhaps the ultimate spin by far,

If Donnie were able to use this disaster

As a way to sure up his election faster.

Who but him could come up with a plot

For a global pandemic to help him a lot?

Perhaps the mystery is not so profound

Why democrats are spinning all around.

But it seems the strategy they’re now taking

Is an awfully big mistake in the making…

They’ve seen that extremes can rally a base

But America is simply not a socialist place.

Dr. Doolittle cared for some unusual beasts

And now in this time of political feasts

I’m reminded of one that seems apropos

Because it’s an animal that really could not go

In one clear direction knowing its way.

The PushMePullYou is like the Dems today…

We live in a time of instant satisfaction

With social media always causing a distraction

By showcasing lives that you’re not leading

And giving your FOMO a big force-feeding.

But why it is better is not very clear

If it simply takes longer for photos to appear.