For those of you blessed with a teenage kid

It’s good fun to put on a flat brim lid

And bust out some words you heard on TikTok

Sending that kid into mortified shock.

Flash your dope rizz and act like a baller…

You’re not skibidi or some old crawler!

It does make me wonder what’s the play here
To sow such mistrust in an election year.
Let’s say that they win, well what happens then?
“Now it’s okay to trust the weathermen!”
It’s all so insane… It seems what they’d like
Is for there to be a huge chaos spike.

“Get tough with China” says the blowhard Don

And impose massive tariffs, it’s game on!

“But don’t pay attention to lil ‘ole me

Since rules don’t apply to me, you see!”

And even if they did what harm is there?

Claiming it’s wrong is fake news and unfair!

I think once a species has gone extinct
You probably do not want to be linked
To any effort for its revival.
I mean, let’s talk about survival…
If you have ever seen Jurassic Park
You know that cloning can get pretty dark.

When it comes to agents helping those in distress
You don’t normally think of the IRS.
But this guy’s a legend, goes above and beyond
And has created a really special bond
That goes past the audits, numbers and zeros
Making him one of America’s heroes.

The horror we witnessed on that dark day
Has only multiplied in a sad way.
So many more lives have now been taken
All hope for goodness has been forsaken.
No matter your side in this terrible war
The human loss rattles down to the core.

I just spent the weekend at UNC

Which is truly a model for what can be.

It finds the balance between all life’s fare

With scholars, athletes and people who care.

This new program came under suspicion

But should be embraced with total conviction.

I have to admit it’s a solid plan.

The place has potential and maybe can

Become a true hot spot, a jewel of the Med!

And I’d rather their focus be there instead

Of being on Washington now and then.

Please, go make Albania great again…

When it comes to crimes of politicians

They’re usually fostered by ambitions

Of growing their wealth and building power

Creating a fortress and a tower.

So it’s kind of funny this far right dude

Just stole from a show the whole world has viewed.

Convicted by a jury of her peers

She has now been sentenced to many years…

She’s lucky she got the sentence she did

Since all of her crimes are no longer hid

And I’m sure she’s taking a deep full breath

‘Cuz those crimes could have led her to her death.