Doomsday is better at selling the news

And if it’s wrong, no one pays any dues.

Tons of predictions are forecasting gloom

But what if things are about to bloom?

Could it be that life will just get no worse?

And does saying that guarantee a curse?!

These little male orcas need so much care

Their mothers are left with no time to spare

For pretty much anything other than

Feeding the tyrants again and again.

The young females don’t need even half as much…

Seems kind of like humans, given as such.

If there’s one thing that we can be sure of

It’s that Donald Trump can’t shake his lure of

Saying the most outrageous things out there

With the only goal to improve his fare.

Whether it destroys the party? Big deal…!

His only agenda is himself, for real.

Longtime readers of these rhymes surely know

That I have no patience when people crow

About their opponents being Nazis…

But this situation? It is not these!

Here we are dealing with genuine loons,

Teaching their children to be Nazi goons.

They’re as conservative as you can get

And the crew at Koch is starting to fret

That it would likely be a disaster

If Donald Trump remains the bandmaster.

If the GOP marches to his beat,

They fear it will end with another defeat.

As if things couldn’t possibly get worse

Congressman Santos added to his curse.

#MeToo is now part of his deal

It’s really no wonder his strong appeal…

Of course, who really knows whether it’s true?

‘Cuz it’s not like the Times even has a clue…

Mr. Beast is a YouTube sensation

Among the most famous in the nation.

And the brilliant thing? His content is kind.

Yet people are mad that he cured the blind,

They say disabilities don’t need a “cure”…

Well, unless they’re blind, what steaming manure!

What could be better than people employed?

Seems like a good way for us to avoid

Increasing crime and the need for handouts

Empowering people and killing their doubts.

So why did the markets take a deep dive?

Because high interest rates will stay alive?

A democrat won her congressional race

Then did something filled with a kind of grace.

She hired her GOP opponent

And it should become a special moment

As they can set an example for all

Bipartisan work will prevent our fall.

Politics change, that should be no surprise.

But when parties flip flop before our eyes

And change course to such a wild degree

As “conservatives” have in the GOP,

Well, it really can make you feel the pain

Of loser leaders seeking personal gain.