The data should come as no big surprise

That in the land of fatty foods and fries

The percentage of people overweight

Continues to increase at a fast rate.

To reduce what they put into their mouth

These drugs are just booming throughout the South.

When it comes to Pope Francis, I’m a fan

Yet sometimes he slips, he’s a mortal man!

Seems to me that his position on this

Is pretty much of a slightly odd miss…

Remember the birth, all meek and mild…

Wasn’t Jesus Christ a surrogate child?!

We’ve known all along that the world is nuts

And that men will pay to see ladies’ butts.

So it should not come as a big surprise

That farmgirls with curves will attract some eyes.

This one has tripled her take-home pay

With the same work… in a thong every day!

Winning at football requires some luck,
But it’s also important not to suck.
And man did the Cowboys suck last night…
Which for many of us was sheer delight!
Don’t know why it is that I feel so glad
When the Dallas Cowboys play so bad.

Like anything, it’s important to learn…

So it should be no surprise to discern

That now there’s a school with its focus on

Teaching the basics when you’re really gone!

I do wonder what these classes are like

Exploring the world of enlightened psych.

I wouldn’t say that there are no dangers

And I sure wouldn’t source it from any strangers

But it seems obvious to most of us

That there’s some good in weed we should discuss.

Certainly it’s in a far different group

Than those drugs which leave you dead on a stoop.

The surly guru of Patriots’ fame

Sure built his success on another name…

Tom Brady carried the team to its wins

And HE had help from deflated pig skins.

Yet despite the slips and a little slime,

Together they were the best of all time.

It does nothing to change the facts of the case

And Harvard has still got a very red face.

But let’s admit that it’s pretty funny

For blowhard Bill Ackman with all his money,

Who shouted out the plagiarism claim,

To discover his wife has done the same!

It’s not clear to me how this has become

A political issue, seems kinda dumb.

I don’t think she was brought down by a mob

Rather how did she ever get this job?!

Forget her fueling of major schism…

You’re thrown out of school for plagiarism.

New names are out and oh what a surprise!

Two of the best at delivering lies…

Of course it’s not new that powerful men

Take advantage of everything that they can.

But it sure isn’t wrong that we would want more

Than leaders who are so dark at the core.