Jim Cramer is such a tired blowhard

Yet his foolish calls have not left him scarred.

It seems to me the thing about this dude

If you take his advice you’ll just get screwed.

He can help you have a million bucks…

If you started with a billion! He just sucks.

When it comes to rain you hear many things…

It’s of course the place where Gene Kelly sings,

And yes cats and dogs may pour from above

While raining men is the Weather Girls’ love!

But one type of rain that might make you squirm?

Over in China involving a worm…

So Biden is worried about Chinese spies

And that Tik Tok gives them a set of eyes

Into things that they just shouldn’t see.

(From what I’ve seen there, seems right to me…)

Kinda dumb, he’ll lose political coin…

If he wants to kill it, he could just join!

What do Donnie, Harry and Meghan share?

(I realize that you might not really care…)

All three have had their homes turn against them!

Spreading bad rumors and coughing up phlegm.

Here we see Fox, Trump’s old personal press

Turning on him, making his life a mess!

Little can surprise us about this guy

And it’s not breaking news he likes to lie.

But this vignette shows a sadder dark side

Heard here pulling heart strings to save his hide,

Claiming his animals were in great need…

Except that he had no fish to feed.

The stats on their output are quite extreme!

Seventy-four tons per day, it would seem.

That’s the same weight as thirty-eight hundred

African elephants, if you’ve wondered.

And yes, that’s in New York City alone…

These dogs are sure not throwing us a bone.

The perils of drinking? Just take your pick!

From poor judgment to dealing with whisky dick.

A world of trouble awaits all of those

Who like me hook onto the alcohol hose.

But here’s one thing I didn’t think to fear

Putting a fungus in the atmosphere!

When Sisyphus angered every Greek god

He was sent to Hell to do something odd.

Push a boulder to the top of a hill,

Then watch it roll down and repeat the drill.

Over and over for the rest of time…

When you’re at work do you do the same climb?

No surprise with how this has unfolded

Elon has weighed in and he has scolded

Everyone everywhere, liberals at fault!

Did he give any thought to the assault

On productive discourse Scott Adams made

When he said all white folk should be afraid?

So all the big dairy guys had a fit…

“You can’t call it milk if no milk’s in it!”

But they weren’t aware of what’s going down

In this case it’s a verb and not a noun…

To milk means exploit as much as you can

And now they’re allowed to advance the plan.